inspiration – Inspired Life

There are all kinds of strategies, ways of thinking, patterns of behavior and practical tips for improving your life and feeling better about yourself, but they’re all redundant if the foundation isn’t there. That foundation is the real you, the you that you know deep down you are. The trick is that it takes confidence to find that and to bring out who you are – here are three keys to real inner confidence.

Get To Know Your Values

Personal values are one of the most important things you can know about yourself and are vital in getting genuine inner confidence. Your values are ten thousand feet down inside you, right at the very core of who you are, and they’re the building blocks, the foundations and cornerstone for you. A value is something in your self, in others or in the work that’s most important to you, and could include things like beliefs, progress, family, fun, nature, achievement or freedom.

What is it that some people and situations leave you feeling angry, frustrated, demotivated or delated? It’s because one or more of you values in being denied, suppressed or repressed – we experience that as a negative experience because it’s denying a fundamental piece of who you are. You know those times when you’ve felt really alive, amazing or buzzing? Those are the times when one or more of your values are being honored, and you can get more of that by living according to them.

Abundance – The Inner Path the Wealth – By Deepak Chopra

Your values are all yours, and no matter what happens, no one can ever take them away. You can have absolute confidence in them because they’re there all the time just waiting for you to notice and use them. When you get to know your values, you can start to make choices and align your life around them. It’s so simple and it feels amazing because all that realy means is that you’re allowing who you are to live in the real world.

2. Exercise the Muscle

Confidence is a muscle and like any muscle you need to exercise it so that it doesn’t shrink and waste away. The problem is that unlike your biceps or glutes, which tend to stay in the same place, your confidence muscle can be harder to to find. How do you develop your biceps or firm up your glutes? By doing exercises that are designed to work that muscle over a period of time until you see the results you were looking for.

It’s just the same with confidence. Let’s say that you’re the kind of person that doesn’t take many risks, the kind of person who goes through each day doing what needs to be done and doing it well, but not really stretching yourself. You might talk yourself out of doing something because it’s too scary or because you think to yourself “I’m not good enough. ‘that’s not who I am’ or “I don’t really want it anyway’. That kind of person lives within what they know and what keeps them safe and comfortable. The fewer risks they take, the less confident they need to be and so the less confident they become.

To work your confidence muscle you need to be prepared to take risks – big or small. You need to be willing to stretch yourself in an unfamiliar direction, to try something new or try something in a slightly different way. You need to open yourself up to the possibilities around you and push yourself to increase what you know, what you do and who you are. The more open you are to risk, opportunity and possibility the more confident you need to be, and so the more confidence you’ll develop. That’s you confidence muscle – the question sis, what are you going to do to exercise it?

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Fear gets to the best of us, whether it is fear of failure, fear of success or even fear of fear. All of us have experienced fear at some point in our lives and it can be a real stumbling block that holds us back from being truly successful. Fear can’t hold you back forever, if you don’t let it. There are several ways to overcome fear, here are my top 9:

SEPARATE REALITY FROM PERCEPTION Ask yourself what is really going on, locate the facts and place them over your feeling.

2. IDENTIFY THE TRIGGER Figure out what it is in a situation that triggers you. Learning to identify it will help you learn to combat it.

KNOW WHERE FEAR LIVES IN YOUR BODY A lot of times, fear takes over physically. It affects different people different ways. Identify if/how it affects your physical body and do the work to take care of your body. Ex: if you hold stress in your back, you can learn stretches, foam rolling, etc. to avoid the pain.
PRACTICE GRATITUDE
Everyday, list out 1-3 things you are thankful for. It doesn’t matter how big or small it is, gratitude helps shift the mind into a positive light, which overtime, overcomes fear.
LISTEN TO YOUR INNER VOICE
Monitor your inner conversations. If you wouldn’t say it to a friend, don’t say it to yourself. Speak positively to yourself and remind yourself of your strengths.
CREATE A NEW ASSOCIATION
Remind yourself that the feeling and the moment will pass. Focus on the positive outcome of the situation, rather than the scary in between.
LOOK AT THE GLASS HALF FULL Perception is a very powerful thing and how your feel about your situation dictates how you respond. So think positively and you’ll give yourself a much better chance at success. This won’t happen overnight, so begin with just one thought. What is one recurring fearful, negative thought you have? Work on reversing this one thought and see how it chances over time.
PRACTICE BREATHING EXERCISES Breathing helps center your body; when you stop breathing, your heart stops beating. You can do a grounding exercise or even just take five long deep breaths at any point to calm and center yourself. It is best to start your day with this, but consider doing it all day long.
CREATE A SAFE SPACE When you feel safe and secure, there is no room for fear. Find somewhere safe you can retreat to when ill feelings begin – whether this is a real place or a place in your mind.